Guitarist jokes

• Q: How can you tell a guitarist is at your door?
  A: By the Dominos Pizza hat.
• Q: What do a guitar solo and premature ejaculation have in common?
  A: You know it's coming and there's nothing you can do about it.
• Q: How do you get two guitar players to play in perfect unision?
  A: Shoot One.
• Q: What would a guitarist do if he won a million dollars?
  A: Continue to play gigs until the money ran out.
• Q: How do you get a guitarist to turn down?
  A: Put some sheet music in front of him.
• Q: What do an electric guitarist and a vacuum cleaner have in common?
  A: When you plug them in, they both suck.
• Q: How many lead guitarists does it take to change a light bulb?
  A: None-- they just steal someone else's light.
  Alternate Answer: 5-- One to change the bulb and 4 do watch him and say "I can do better than that."
  Alternate Answer: Only one-- but he'll go though a whole box of bulbs before he finds just the right one.
• Q: In the 22nd Century, how many guitarists will it take to change a light source?
  A: 5-- One to do it and 4 to reminisce about how much better the old tubes were.
• Q: How does a Lead Guitarist change a lightbulb?
  A: He holds it and the world revolves around him.
• Q: What's the difference between a fiddle & a violin?
  A: Who cares - neither one's a guitar!
• Q: What's the difference between a Lead Guitarist and the PLO?
  A: You can negotiate with the PLO.
• Q: Did you hear about the guitarist who was in tune?
  A: Neither have I.
• Q: Why do musicians have to be awake by six o'clock?
  A: Because most shops close by six thirty.
• Q: Why are so many guitar player jokes one liners?
  A: So the rest of the band can understand them.
• Q: What's black and blue and laying in a ditch?
  A: A guitarist who's told too many drummer jokes.
• 2 guys were walking down the street. One was destitute.
  The other was a guitarist as well.